Should ‘Father’ Be Spelled with a Capital F?

Should you spell ‘father’ with a capital ‘f’? If that’s a question that’s been bothering you for a while, then you’re in the right place. But before we get started, a little aside.

If you’ve been reading TDD for a while you’ll know that I always spell ‘Dad’ with a capitalised ‘D’. Is that a grammatical error? Or is there something deeper behind the need to capitalise the ‘D’? Keep reading and I’ll tell you. But first, here’s a quick grammar lesson.

Is the F in Father Capitalized? – The Grammar Bit

Should you spell ‘father’ with a capital ‘f’? The answer is a resounding ‘It depends’.

If you are using the word ‘Father’ or ‘Dad’ as a proper noun, then you should use a capital letter. For example:

Father, do you want to go to the UFC fight tonight?

Or

Dad, can I carry that heavy dumbbell for you?

But if you are using ‘father’ or ‘dad’ as a common noun, you shouldn’t capitalise the ‘f’. This could look like this:

All fathers should have equal rights with mothers.

And

We’re having a dads’ open day at school next week.

Simple really – if you’re referring to Father or Dad as their name (proper noun) then use a capital, if not you don’t.

Why I Always Capitalise the D in Dad

Dads matter. You matter. I know sometimes fatherhood feels like running up a travelator in a hurricane while juggling cats. With leather soled dress shoes on.

Being a Dad is tough. And as far as I can tell, it doesn’t get easier. You just get a bit better at it every day.

Whatever part you play in your kids’ lives you matter to them a whole lot more than you realise. Studies have shown that kids who have an involved Dad at home are less likely to:

• Commit suicide
• Drop out of school
• Get pregnant before eighteen
• End up in prison or juvenile detention (Source: The Fatherless Generation)

You should own the name  ‘Dad’ or ‘Father’ with pride. Providing the right DNA to make another human being doesn’t make you a Dad – you need to earn that title.

All around you, Dads are being put down or told they don’t matter. Forty years ago, there wasn’t such a thing as ‘father’s rights’.

There is a concerted push to minimize and feminize the role of fathers in society. This can only have detrimental effects.

Men’s rights and those who publicise them are treated as if they are underground extremist hate groups.

Dads Who Do More Put the Work in Every Day

A while ago I chose the tagline ‘For Dads Who Do More’ for This Dad Does. But what does that mean?

It means putting the work in every day. No one is going to sit you down and tell you how to become a better man – and therefore a better father. You’re going to have to get off your backside and get your hands dirty.

What does ‘doing more’ look like? Let me put it this way: what do you need to do more of?

Do you need to eat healthier and more regularly?

Do you need to lose your Dad Bod or just fend it off?

Do you need to be more engaged with your kids?

Do you need to spend more time at home and less time at work?

I can’t answer any of these questions for you. Only you can be truly honest with yourself. A Dad who does more chooses to rise to the top – to be the best you can be and to pass that mindset onto your kids.

And that means putting the work in. Every single day.

Life’s a grind. Anyone who tells you otherwise is lying to you. You’ll have tough times at home, at work. People you love will get sick and die. Others will leave your life forever with little or no explanation.

What matters is how you life your life. Do you live it with positivity and with others in mind? Do you live it to provide for your family and teach them about the world?

If you do, you are a Dad who does more. Because a lot of Dads don’t do the thing your doing. That’s what sets you apart from the rest. Your kids know it even if they haven’t figured out why yet. And one day they’ll thank you.

Until that comes, keep grinding. And whenever you see ‘Dad’ spelled with a capital ‘D’, recommit to owning that title.

Because every day you put the work in is a day you earn the right to be called ‘Dad’.

Neil

P.S. What does modern fatherhood look like? That’s an important question and one I’ll answer in my upcoming book. I’ll send you a free pre-release copy when you sign up here.