The Dad Bod is one of the reasons I started This Dad Does. An acquaintance of mine was sitting opposite me. He leaned back and patted his growing midriff. ‘I’ve got a Dad-Bod now’, he said with a degree of triumph. ‘It’s what you get when you’re a Dad’.

Sorry, what?

When did this become acceptable? To see weight gain and an unhealthy lifestyle as inevitable. Or worse – something to be proud of.

If you genuinely think the Dad Bod is OK or something to be proud of, leave. Come back when you’ve seen sense.

In case you needed any persuading, here is Dom Mazzetti’s take on the dreaded Dad Bod.

Disclaimer: If you are easily offended, or don’t understand satire, don’t click on the video.

What is the Dad Bod?

The Dad Bod is mediocrity in Father form. A Dad with the Dad Bod might go to the gym occasionally or ride his bike to work. But he also eats cake like it’s going out of fashion. The closest thing he does to ‘eating clean’ is washing his takeaway tubs before putting them in the recycling.

A Dad Bod Dad has a flabby belly, baby man-boobs and gets breathless walking up stairs.

He also hasn’t had a visible jaw-line since that little red line appeared in between the two blue ones.

The only six pack he’s seen was the one he drank while watching Goggle Box lying on the sofa last Friday. (For non-UK readers, Goggle Box is a TV show designed to rot the brains of the masses).

The only time he has big shoulders is when he wears that suit jacket from the 1980’s

The Dad Bod doesn't have to be a reality if you are committed to improving yourself.

The Dad Bod doesn’t have to be a reality if you are committed to improving yourself (don’t worry, I don’t wear lifting gloves anymore).

The key thing is he’s happy with the situation. Or if he’s not happy, he isn’t motivated enough to do anything about it.

Instead he exists in a kind of flabby body stasis where he’s not obese, not super unhealthy. Just a bit ‘meh’.

Why is the Dad Bod a Disease on Dads?

Before I get accused of fat or body shaming I can say these things because I’ve been there. In my early to mid 20’s I took almost no care over my physical appearance. I never went to the gym.

Apart from a little running now and then and an occasional salad, my diet was primarily fast food, diet sodas and desserts. Unhealthy, yes. But a disease? Surely I’m coming on too strong here.

The problem is that the Dad Bod goes deeper than just physical appearance. It’s an image that is bleeding the masculinity out of us.

Slowly.

Silently.

We are meant to be hunters, warriors, protectors. Not cola-swilling layabouts who lift a dumbbell now and then. But is it really a disease?

1. It promotes a mediocrity mindset

This is the primary problem with the Dad Bod. It’s not a question of body-image or whether you look fit or not. It’s whether being unhealthy and overweight is a state that you’re willing to accept.

Those who promote the Dad Bod (women mainly) say it’s OK to have a Dad Bod as nobody really wants to be fit anyway. Plus life is too busy to be a good Dad and be healthy. You choose one or the other.

Some women have even come out and said that they prefer a Dad Bod to a fit, healthy, lean, muscular male body.

They are lying or have insecurities or both. Either way you should ignore it.

“Check your health at the door when the first kid comes along. More than one and you might as well buy those expanding waist jeans cos you’re never coming back.”

This mindset is toxic. It is not ‘OK’ just to accept that an unhealthy lifestyle is an inevitability of Fatherhood. You always have a choice.

2. A Dad Bod is storing up health problems for the future

There is a powerful body of evidence that suggests links between heart disease and various cancers with an unhealthy lifestyle and excess body fat.

this dad does why the dad bod is a disease salad.jpg

Basing a diet around healthy carbs, protein and salads will help combat the Dad Bod.

This is especially true for men who greatly increase their chance of heart disease with extra weight. Weight gain and excess body fat has also been shown to lower testosterone levels and increase levels of estrogen. Nobody wants that.

Added to this is an increased risk of type 2 diabetes which comes with its own bingo card of associated health problems. Still think a Dad Bod is acceptable?

3. It’s a bad example to your kids

When was the last time you saw unfit, unhealthy parents with fit, healthy kids? It’s pretty rare isn’t it? A couple of years ago I was in the Netherlands. I saw a whole school of kids and not a single one was over weight.

When I saw the parents, it was the same story.

If we pass good habits on to our children, does the same not happen for bad?

How often do you see significantly overweight kids accompanied by parents who have clearly passed on their bad habits of overeating and inactivity to their offspring?

Dad Bloggers are some of the worse for promoting this toxic, unhealthy lifestyle. When I called them on it, I got hate and threats.

If kids see their Dad constantly chowing down junk foods, full sugar sodas and fried stuff with cheese, they’ll think that’s acceptable, even normal.

wide grip bench press

What is the answer to the Dad Bod?

There’s always an alternative. Don’t accept the Dad Bod as inevitable. Instead there are ways that you can defeat the Dad Bod.

1. Choice: When I was newly married, someone said to me ‘Well that’s it Neil, you’re going to put on lots of weight now you’re married’. I was stunned. The thought horrified me. I made a decision that would never be me. As long as I was able, I would be striving to keep myself healthy and my weight down. It’s a struggle every day. But nothing worth doing is ever easy.

2. Get a support network: If you’re the average of your five closest friends, then having friends who share a passion for healthy living and being a good example to their kids is a must. Don’t compromise on who you spend time with. Find some other Dads, hang out, eat and be active together. Take your kids. They’ll learn the value of these things quickly.

If you need accountability, find a forum or a like minded group of guys. There are Dads who read this site who are committed to improving their fitness. Try contacting them or access message boards like those at T-Nation.

3. Make a change: If you don’t like something about your lifestyle or your body. Change it. Don’t wait until the 1st of January or when the time is right. Change what needs to be changed and do it today. You will always be busy, tired, stressed. These are called excuses. Don’t be ruled by them.

Start lifting weights, preferably using a programme. I use and recommend Jim Wendler’s 531 as it’s simple and efficient (important if you’re a Dad).

Final Thoughts on the Dad Bod

So is the Dad Bod a disease?

If its seen as aspirational or acceptable, then yes. The Dad Bod is a disease.

But if you’ve read this far you don’t buy that any more. You are not prepared to follow the crowd. You will prioritise your health and be a good Dad at the same time. Because that’s what your family and especially your kids deserve.

Because that’s what we do.

 

P.S. Inspired to lose your Dad Bod? Check out my article on How to Start Weight Training.

About Neil M White

Neil has been writing for a number of years. He has worked as a freelance writer both in the UK and internationally and has worked on a number of high profile media projects. Neil spends his spare time hiking, in the gym or hanging out with his family.

5 comments add your comment

  1. Hey Neil,

    Nice article.

    I’m not a dad yet. But when I do have kids one day? I definitely won’t let my life result in mediocrity… aka the Dad Bod.

    Keep up the good work and get the Dad Bod movement headed back to wherever it came from!

    Cheers,
    Ben

  2. Great reasons above and you can add the ‘add life to your years’ to them. I have been motivated to stick to a lifetime of healthy habits by a desire to chase my grandkids around with the same wild abandon I did my own kids. Can’t do that when you are round, stiff, and winded from one flight of stairs.

    • Yes that’s a great point Jon and thanks for commenting – a great incentive to stay fit and healthy. When I see unhealthy parents it makes me sad for the children’s and future grandchildren’s sake. Having that long term view is something many Dads lack.

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